The Courage to Lead: Enough Success for Us All
Last week, I had the privilege of attending a Women in Leadership Forum, and it was unlike any professional space I’ve ever entered. For once, women were not shrinking back from their doctoral degrees, nor softening their brilliance to make others feel more comfortable. Instead, they stood tall, encouraged one another, and celebrated success without hesitation.
It reminded me of research summarized in Sandberg’s Lean In—the famous “Jill vs. Jack” study. The exact same vignette, when the supervisor was assigned the name “Jack,” led to participants rating him as competent and likeable. When the name was changed to “Jill,” ratings dropped sharply. Same words. Same actions. Different gender. This study captures the reality many women leaders face: Perceptions of our competence are filtered through bias before we even speak.
In my own journey, I have seen both sides of this coin. I’ve worked alongside women who were so insecure that collaboration felt like walking through a minefield. The scars of their competitiveness and mistrust run deep — scars many women leaders know all too well. Thankfully, I’ve also experienced the opposite: Supportive, encouraging, confident women who embody the belief that there is enough success for us all. That, I believe, is the dream.
I think often about one former boss who regularly presented the work of myself and another female colleague as her own. At the time, we laughed it off as “crazy,” not realizing how destructive it was — not just to us personally, but to a culture that desperately needs women to lift one another up.
bell hooks once said:
“Sometimes people try to destroy you, precisely because they recognize your power — not because they don’t see it, but because they see it and they don’t want it to exist.”
These words cut to the heart of the matter. When women in leadership face sabotage or mistrust, it is often a reaction to our very real power within an organization.
So how can we, as women in leadership, shift this narrative? The simple answer is this: By establishing authentic sisterhood to one another. Here are just a few starting points:
Stand up against vilification. Strong women leaders are often unfairly cast as “too much” or painted as villains when they push for change. There’s a reason the movie Wicked resonates so widely — it captures the lived experience of being misunderstood or maligned. Resist the temptation to join the masses. Instead, celebrate, defend, and amplify the contributions of women leaders in public forums so that their voices remain strong and courageous.
Give credit where it’s due. In leadership, recognition is currency. Make it a practice to highlight the work of other women openly and without hesitation. Never pass off someone else’s work — and speak up when you see others trying to take credit that doesn’t belong to them. When women visibly lift one another up, it strengthens the culture for everyone.
Discern your trusted colleagues wisely. As Dr. Cherina Betters reminded us in her keynote address, not every woman in your professional orbit is necessarily in your corner. Learn to distinguish between your inner circle — your true sisters whose advice you can trust — and the wider outer circle of colleagues and acquaintances. Both circles matter, but know who you can lean on when making hard decisions and where vulnerability is truly safe.
Mentor with abundance. Leadership is not a zero-sum game. Invest generously in the next generation of women leaders by offering your guidance, opportunities, and hard-earned lessons. Sharing your seat at the table does not diminish your influence — it expands it, ensuring that women’s leadership continues to thrive long after you’ve moved to your next chapter.
Remember: Leadership is not about guarding seats but expanding opportunities. When women in school leadership rise together — especially during this era of heightened scrutiny — we model courage, equity, and collaboration. Our collective strength becomes the driving force for innovation and hope in every school and for every student we serve.
